Some of you may have seen the show Electric Dreams on television last night – it was about this family that had their house transformed into a replica of one from the 1970s, thus taking out nearly all modern comforts and gadgets. The first time the family returned to their house there were the usual shrieks of shock, but as I watched I admit there was a part of me – a small part – that was slightly envious. I also remember a time when all I had for entertainment was a hand held transistor radio in my bedroom, when I made mix tapes (off the radio, not an LP) and when I had to put up with temperamental television sets.
The life you had was your own; you didn’t have to splice it with any online identit(ies) or presence.
I must admit there have been a procession of events this past week that altogether have made me question this blog, this space. This question isn’t necessarily fair either, as it’s not the blog’s ‘fault’. No, the fault is mine and I am casting about for excuses.
The problem is that I don’t know what the problem is with me.
My concentration span is zero, I am sleeping more than ever, I am not training. I am even (and brace yourselves) doing housework. Anything to avoid writing.
Of course, I am exaggerating slightly. I am sending off a story this week, actually. To re-balance out the two rejection letters that came in last month (in my defence, however, one of those pieces I have absolutely no recollection of even posting. Perhaps I did it in the strange, sad weeks following Dad’s death).
So as I muck my way through this month, when I’m supposed to be writing more words than ever, I’ll just try to imagine I’m in that 1970’s house. More than that, I might have to step back from teh Internetz.
At least I’ll try.
10:02 am
I watched that show – the first thing I noticed was that the kitchen they thought so primitive looked exactly like the kitchen of every house I’ve ever rented (from 2000-2004). Poor things, how will they ever manage?
10:11 am
So sorry that you are feeling so distracted and unfocussed, Karen. I can relate. This past 12 months has been a difficult one for me health wise and that seems to have highlighted for me how many different directions I am trying to move in simultaneously.
I saw part of Electric Dreams last night as well and admit to feeling quite nostalgic for days when life was simpler. Less fragmented, certainly.
Allowing yourself to refocus on your writing isn’t a bad thing, although I would miss reading your thoughts here. I hope you are able to take some time to simply relax and take a deep breath and that your world moves back into focus soon.
10:13 am
Maybe it’s more than just you. I too have been having trouble focusing on my blog. In the past when I’ve had a need to recoup it’s taken no longer than a week or so. But now it’s been quite some time. I just feel disengaged. I wonder if Facebook, Twitter et al are distracting us too much? Maybe some time away from those is in order.
Anyway, time to do some housework!
12:40 pm
Gosh the disease is going around isn’t it. I feel like this a LOT, and there’s no writing to be done but other stuff.
I sort of feel the internet is as much about making connections as it is procrastination. My neighbourhood street is pretty much empty during the day and I am home alone with small children. I *need* to connect to stay sane and that’s what the internet does for me.
6:48 pm
You are not alone in feeling like this. I am only just now starting to take photos again. My whole creative focus has tilted slightly since Mum died. You will be right, maybe you should just focus on your garden(or something else) for a bit and put the blog aside for a couple of weeks.
Also I reckon 50 000 words in a month is just putting unecessary pressure on yourself. xox Kim
7:00 am
Thanks ladies, and yes it’s been a rough year, hasn’t it? Maybe if we can ride it out next year will be better and then we won’t feel like this anymore…